New Chapter + Fitness + Dancing Fish @ BSC

Hey, I'm back sooner than I thought I would be, and I guess that's because I wanted to record this experience down. So this would already be my second week of working. I would say so far so good. I have never heard anyone commenting that being a kindergarten teacher is an easy job to do. Every morning, I would wake up with this sense of responsibility and an attitude to adapt as fast as I can in this ever so changing environment. Not one day it is the same. I guess that's what I like and enjoy most of. Not forgetting the children there who play a part too. Yesterday, Nikki and I had to stay back awhile for a short meeting to discuss on the sport's activities. It went well, just had to make some changes. I really wanted an activity that involved water however, the place that were to be set up wouldn't allow it. So boohoo. Nevertheless, they said we helped alot as they were running out of ideas and needed some tweaking of the new ones. It actually made me feel pretty glad that I was able to help out. Moving on to the past week's agenda!

On a super hot Wednesday afternoon, after work, I drove to IMU to pick up an IELTS activity book from Jess. If it weren't for her, I don't think I would have expected the papers to be like this. So far, I have only completed the first exam. There are five more to go and here I am just about to turn 10PM. Just not feeling too good right now actually sigh. A little while after that, found Felice and Vicknesh and drove to New Chapter by Owl's Cafe. I wasn't really too excited about the place as I have seen many pictures of it on instagram. The food did not disappoint though, same same as the owl's cafe. The session was alright. Just catching up on current plans and situations. Mainly bitching about others and prom ahaha. I hope I remember. I honestly do feel that we aren't as tight anymore but I know that we would always try to keep in contact with each other. They didn't really seem as supportive or encouraging in what I am doing but it doesn't matter because it is my life. Not that their opinion really matters, but I guess I thought better.

Besides that, I have also been talking to Yoong recently. I really miss talking to him. I feel sad when he's down because I know he has a soft heart. I hope things would really get better with time and I believe it does! I'm still on the way there to improve and work on myself. Selfishly, I want to be beautiful and to be able to take care of myself. Hah, talking about taking care of myself, I only applied to one cafe which is Olfactory Bulb but they said they didn't need part-time workers at the moment for April but might need an extra pair of hands in May only on the weekends. I could consider that but I would only be able to work in May as my degree commences in June. So I don't think it would be possible for me to juggle two jobs when I am studying. So yeah. Gonna rely on my pay from the kindergarten? Money is so important to me. And that's why I will earn it!!!

OOTD

TOP: FOREVER 21

SKIRT: BANGKOK

I am actually quite surprised by the result of this picture as we only took two LOL. We celebrated Teachers' Day at the Dancing Fish in BSC because my boss wouldn't be around in May. It was kinda awkward at first but in a lil while later, it got a lot better. Depends on who would really want to laugh along and make silly jokes. I'm so grateful for this experience honestly. The food 10/10. Local home-cooked kinda style? I ate way over my limit though. Still, the bosses were very generous with their portions. Soon after, the bunch of us teachers went window shopping at the grocery section. I literally absorbed the ambience of the bread shop. It was so so so so so lovely. Cookies were like an inch thick! Coffee smelt so good there. Muffins freshly baked from the oven. Which inspired me to make my own at home hmph. One of it costs nearly RM7. Insane. But I'm pretty sure they used high quality ingredients, oh well. Bought 3 sticks of butter. Will be baking them chocolate cookies again! :)

Missing out Nikki :(

Once again, thank you so much for letting me be a part of the team. Till then! Goodnight!

Toasty

I tried. Well, up to now, everything is falling into place. It's the month of April already. Crazy shit fast. If I were to compare to what I did last year, I'm just stunned. I know I'm better than this. I have realized that I stopped caring. That I don't really have a care about the world except for my family and I. Here I am, saying that I am absolutely grateful for my supportive and caring family. Each and everyone member of my family have influenced and shaped me to the person who I am today. Not forgetting about the people who have deeply hurt me. All in all, what is important is that I have learnt my lesson and choose to be happy. I stopped being positive and loving to myself because I felt that I was doing everything wrong. Thankfully, time has a part to do. 

First thing first, currently I am working full-time as an assistant educator in Krisaliz Kindergarten. My own kindergarten! I feel extremely blessed to be offered this job, and I was interviewed by Ms.Ng who was my teacher. There were the previous staff as well who has been working there ever since, what really surprised me was that they remembered me. It was because of the way my name was spelled and that I was associated with Simon and Melissa along with my sister. They remembered mom too as a super nice lady. So I have been working there for a week already and it's pretty cool. Relaxed and steady. It's important that you love being around children if not don't even think about signing yourself up for this course. 

The outlook and prospects of this course and career is bright. That's why I really am into it. Right. I will be starting my degree course of BA (Hons) Early Years in SEGI College Subang Jaya. Again, I was really attracted to this one because the modules stood out, interesting and straight cut specialized. Not only that, the awarding institution is by University of Greenwich, UK. This course is completely done in Malaysia which would really save a lot of cost for my parents especially when my dad is the breadwinner of the family and my sister would be furthering her studies in Canada soon. So it's pretty great. I have also made a new friend, her name is Nikki Lee and such a super coincidence that she is the same age as my brother and I know her sister as well. It really does feel that the jigsaw puzzle of my life is slowly connecting one by one. I know I will do great in this course.

Last weekend, my family and I except my brother, went to Yellow Brick Road for brunch. My sister's treat! It was quite lovely, had some sweet mash potatoes, avocado mix and two poached eggs on rye bread. Honestly, my first and last time there, I do not understand what the hype is all about. After that, we went to Bangsar Village II, I was with my dad the whole time and I felt comfortable about that. Dad bought a new pair of slippers and socks from Aldo. A little while after that, we had latte at this burger restaurant because it was the only place that allowed smoking lol. We talked about this course and my life. Oh man, I am so glad that we had that talk. I just felt more at ease. So, he had fully paid my course for three years in advance so I would have to do really well. Perseverance and hard work is key. I know I can do this. I will.

I guess my plans for now is to really give it my all. I am 20 years old. By the time I'd graduate is when I am 23 years old but to only get the certificate when I am 24 years old. I know I didn't need to write that out but since I am already here why not. I would work in the kindergarten full time, studying full time. My pay isn't really that high so I was thinking of getting another job, since right now it is all about saving money. I want to be able to travel around the world. Show that I am indeed independent. As of now, I also would have to prepare for my IELTS exam. Minimum band score of 6. This coming Wednesday, I will be going to IMU to see my friends and collect a book from Jess. Settle some financial stuff. Passed my DN books to Ceymone to help me sell it off to juniors. 

I want to live that minimal life. I have been getting rid of useless things in my room. I would say it's pretty good. I just need to let go of that attachment of clothes. I do not need shoes. I do not need any more new clothes. Don't even need new lingerie. I have been thinking of investing in skincare. A new moisturizer, lip liner. Uhm yea. Besides that, I just need to be more confident about myself. I keep comparing myself to these instagram girls. Then again, I have been taking a lot more naps instead of working out. Haih. It really is all about saving money right now. I am so practical lol. Baked some chocolate cookies yesterday too! I just need to rebake them to make it more crispy. Should have not rushed it. After this, I am probably gonna make some tea. Then head to bed. I have work tomorrow. 

Ciao, I hope after reading this, what I have planned will come true. I am always very thankful for that God listens to my prayers. Thank you for blessing my family and I with the best of health, wealth, safety and happiness at all times. Goodnight.

TOP: Kitschen

SKIRT: Uniqlo

BAG: Bangkok

how much fucks i give

fuck. thats one. i dont care whether you hated me. i dont care whether you even liked me. what happened in the past doesn't even matter. it seriously doesn't. if it didnt happen then why bring it up. that's all. everything is really simple. it really is. i cannot talk to my parents. i cannot. i cannot talk to them.

ugly, unwanted, and useless

I feel. What the fuck is going on. I regret deleting all those hard times, those posts where I poured my heart out. I don't know why. I feel safer though that they're not around. Got rid a lot of trash from my room, yet I feel incomplete. One thing to another. I'm so thankful for my friends who help me get out of my suicidal depression thoughts. The smallest matter can really trigger the worst in me. First, no more DN. No more AA. No more ECE. No talk on Business and Management. And now we're back to ECE. Everyone doesn't see that I'm fucking trying. I'm fucking trying so hard.

Coldplay

Their songs literally make me want to cry. Or just think about life. Amazing.

Late night blues + Sam Smith

I don't know how to describe this feeling of hollowness. It's not that major, I just feel like I'm done. And maybe this is a sign that my time of the month is around the corner, since pimples are popping out on my forehead. Eating a lot of the granola didn't help either. This year, I feel so unbelievably shot down. What am I really doing with my life? I'm wasting time, procrastinating. Using it with nonsense. Spending it with matters that would not add up in my life. Never mind, I don't know. I'm 20. But I still don't know who I am, or what I really want. I mean I do have these goals and achievements that I have yet to score but I'm not feeling it. Not feeling it at all. It's so frustrating how I am easily affected by all these challenges and heartache. I wish I was stronger mentally. Goodnight.

Skype dates + Panda + Vegan Granola

I really do enjoy having skype dates with my friends who are especially close and dear to me. Yesterday night, I skyped with Desirene who is currently in UoM. It was pretty cool cuz we could talk about anything, the longest conversation with her ever. Three hours in total? Or more, can't really remember as I was kinda tired. Not only that, I even talked to Mei for an hour just catching up bout life and recent events. It just reminds me how blessed and grateful I am for those people who truly want to be my friend and to let me know how they are doing. It shows that they do think about me, and I truly appreciate that so much. I would have to admit that I am the type of person who needs their space at times and I cannot tolerate clingy-ness ( if that's even a word , sorry ) It's like those once in a while catch-up times. I believe that long-distance friendships or relationships can work, only if the other side of the party is committed to it. Yeah.

Met up after five years, here is my best friend since primary school, Amanda! I'm so glad and grateful for this meet today. It was really great to see her doing well and being the same old girl that I remember and love. Total candid picture heh. We met up in ou and had Kyochon for lunch! Their set meals are pretty worth it if you share so yeah. The yuza drink was so fizzy oh my goodness. We struggled to finish it, not that it was bad. It just didn't taste right, sour and fizzy. Woah. A lil while after that, we went window shopping in Cold Storage. I absolutely love looking at food, their ingredients and colorful pantry of delicious glorious food that I know one day I must have. 

Since I don't go out that often, I spent quite a bit. Just on some sponges, a set of notebooks from Muji. The quality of the notebooks are so good. I was pleasantly surprised by their stationary collection as it was my type of taste. Wood-like, sleek, and minimalistic. I would definitely go back there to get more interesting and unique kind of stationary. It was reasonably priced as well. To sum it all up, it has been a pretty good day. I haven't had that feeling of comfortableness in a while. I'm sure you know how it feels like to see an old friend that you know you can completely trust and be yourself around that person. After that, we went inside Uniqlo too hehe.

I don't know why I put that bee emoji there but I guess I thought it was cute heh.

Top: Kitschen

Skirt: Uniqlo

Lipstick: PONY

My meetup with Amanda was pretty short so after that I went to a nearby bakery, and bought a pack of almonds, sunflower seeds, maple syrup and rolled oats. I was really in the mood for some baking. The success of the product coming out is the best feeling ever. Also knowing that your family or friends love eating it, it just drives me to try to bake new things. So far I have mentioned that I baked cinnamon rolls, chocolate cake and just now, granola. You wouldn't believe me if I said this, but damn, that granola is amazing. My mom approves it even though she doesn't like cinnamon or peanut butter heh. By the way, as if I didn't need to mention this, it's all vegan. Oh, and just cuz it's vegan, it doesn't necessarily mean that it's like a super healthy alternative. Vegans can live the fat life too heh. With that being said, I work out man. Oh my goodness, it was thighs and butt day, I am literally aching. It didn't really help that yesterday was H.I.I.T either lol. But the pain and ache is worth it. 

snapchat: jiexiyeo 

Your eyes can't unsee this. You know you gotta try it.

Healthy Gluten-Free Granola Recipe

Credits: HealthyNutNutrition

Dry Ingredients

-2.5 cups Gluten free rolled oats
-1 cup raw almonds
-1 cup sunflower seeds
-1/2 cup raisins
-2 tbsp. ground flax seeds
-1 tsp. cinnamon 
-1/2 tsp. sea salt

-1 tbsp. chia seeds

Wet Ingredients
-1/2 cup maple syrup 
-1/4 cup natural peanut butter
-1 tsp.vanilla extract

-1 tablespoon of golden syrup

1. Combine all the dry ingredients in a huge mixing bowl. Stir so that oats are evenly coated.

2. Combine all the wet ingredients in a pot, heat it up and melt the ingredients together on low heat.

3. With the combined wet ingredients slightly cooled down, pour it into the dry mixture. Mix well.

4. Pour everything on a baking tray lined with parchment paper. Press it down to a flat layer.

5. Bake granola in an oven @ 300F // 175 C for 40 - 45 minutes ( toss half-way through )

~ You can totally add different types of nuts, dried fruit and sweetener but that's what I simply used.

Enjoy baking! It can be enjoyed as a lovely snack on it's own or with some cold yogurt!